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Monday, July 20, 2009

Overcome Deadline Stress, Laugh!

"Silence is not only golden; it is seldom misquoted." —Bob Monkhouse

By Scoti Springfield Domeij

Stressed out by a deadline? Irritated by family interruptions sabotaging your nonnegotiable writing time? Exhausted after meeting that deadline? A writer's response to deadline stress is often not a laughing matter. The University of Maryland Medical Center study "Laughter is Good for Your Heart" (2000, November 17), reveals that a good sense of humor and the ability to laugh at stressful situations lessens the physical effects of distressing emotions.

I enjoy laughing hard, long and regularly. Do you need a good laugh to…?

  • relax
  • protect your heart
  • raise that bad mood
  • decrease your stress
  • make you feel better
  • lower your blood pressure
  • strengthen your immune system
  • restart your nonfunctioning brain
  • de-stress your relationship with others

Then I hope you'll stretch those facial muscles heavenward and enjoy these quotes overheard in New York City.

Harry Potter Fans

Chick on Cell: Look, there are only two people other than me who can construct a sentence that awesome: Severus Snape and Keith Olbermann, and one of them isn't even real!

Another Chick on Her Cell: Is he one of Voldemort's friends from high school?

Loud Girl to Friend: Because seriously, how many real redheads do we actually know? And Ron Weasley doesn't count!

IT VP: This guy at work told me the ending to the last Harry Potter book before I read it. So I fired him.

The Grammatical Correctness Capital of America

Cashier: Wow, you speak really good English. Where are you from?

Hipster Asian Dude: I'm from Tokyo and I've been taking classes since I was three so I'm really articulate and speak great English.

Cashier: Really?

Hipster Asian Dude: No. I'm from Queens.


 

Twitchy Dude to No One in Particular: What? You selling something? What you selling? You all are devils! Devil worshipers! Bunch of devil worshipers! Devils, devils, devils! See you in hell! Oh...I won't be there, though.


 

Young Guy on Cell Talking about a Video Game: I gave them my soul. I gave them my soul! See, my soul legally belongs to you, so you tricked them. (pause) Give him his soul! Give him his soul! What? What? Too late!


 

Woman Looking for Friend who Got Lost in Massive Crowd: Marco! Marco!

Massive Crowd of People: Polo!

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